We all fall in love but what happens if your love interest is none other than your best friend! Find out how to deal with the situation when you fall in love with your best friend.
You meet people from all walks of life and connect with individuals who match your ideologies. Then, you become friends, to form a bond by sharing things, be it personal or professional. But sometimes, you find yourself in awkward situations where you feel more than friendship or to say it clearly - love. It becomes complicated when you fall in love with your best friend because of constant thoughts where you think - If I communicate my feelings then I may ruin our friendship and lose a good friend forever, or If I do not communicate then I may be hiding my true feelings from my best friend. Believe us, the situation when you fall in love with a close friend can get weirder either way if you do not seek guidance.
Here's how you can save a friend for your whole life when you are in love with your best friend:
Recollect and Evaluate Your Feelings
Firstly, you have to understand the nature of your feelings, the urge you feel for your best friend. You have to consider your friend's feelings as well when evaluating your feelings. Try to put yourself in your best friend's situation and think of your bonding time with them. Would you want to change anything about the friendship? When or what made you feel more than friends with them? Was it when you were hanging out, and their touch felt different? Or was it when you were playing a choices game (Truth or Dare/ Do or Drink), and you felt the charm? Or was your mind blown by their beautiful thoughts, intellect, and actions? Or you had an intense dream about them, which stimulated your emotions for them. Assess everything from the first time you met, when the feelings developed and, the current situation with your close friend.
Delve Deep
Once you recollect your feelings, it is time to invest a bit more and find why you feel this way about your best friend. When they are around, what do you feel? Is it comfort, peace, or magnetism? Do not feel bad even if you feel a bit of physical affection towards them it is a natural thing, but respectfully communicating this admiration is a must. Also, it may or may not be love, but mood swings too, therefore examine them wisely to let things fall in the right place.
Now that you are in love with your best friend, What to do?
You have examined your feelings to know that you love your best friend. However, you are still unsure of their feelings. There is a lot you want to share with your best friend, to speak your mind, letting them know about your legit feelings towards them. But, before that keep the following points in mind:
- Do not misread their friendly gestures towards you as signs that they also feel the same way.
- Try to remain friends with them until you are assessing your feelings for them.
- Do not ruin the spontaneity the friendship holds by expecting your friend to read between the lines.
- Keep yourself in a healthy condition, do not obsess over the feelings for your best friend.
If you decide to open up to them, do it respectfully. Do not send a text saying, 'Listen, buddy, I think I love you' or similar things. Doing so makes you look a little immature. When you meet them personally, preferably alone, convey your thoughts to them. Stay calm when they respond and, don't be overwhelmed when the answer is YES or NO.
What to do when the answer is a Yes?
If your best friend affirms your feelings, first, stop grinning like an idiot. Now, it is time to understand these feelings mutually. How do you want this relationship to be? Do you want to let it be the same way or take the next step? Experts suggest that before you take the plunge, keep an open relationship, where either of you can decide whether or not this relationship works. If it does, Yipee! and if it doesn't, then both of you can choose to stay friends. However, friendship will not be like it was before. So, when you both decide to end the relationship, work on the awkwardness if you want to remain friends.
What to do when the answer is a No?
You thought about the same, and it happened. But do not feel guilty, disrespectful, or any negative thing about it. You had the guts to convey your feelings, so what if they do not feel the same way. If you want to continue being friends with them, it is okay. You want to end the friendship and move on, sure. Respect your feelings, do not lose yourself.
Do not want to lose your friend by conveying your secret attraction towards them? Yes, this is normal. But you would have to work on yourself to keep this unknown to them. How you behave in their presence and what you communicate to yourself in their absence, everything. Stay a genuine friend, and if the situation hurts you, distance yourself from them for a while. Take a break to work on yourself as you do not have to break yourself over this.
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